rising from the ashes

  • Madeline Hogan

A New Beginning

Updated: Sep 17, 2018

I’ve begun teaching yoga here in Madrid and I love it. Each class is an opportunity to learn something about myself – one of the highlights was when I said “track for the giggliness arising”and we all just burst out laughing! I’m learning how creative I am when I am just in the moment. I am thrilled to have my website up and running and my wish is that you will find it useful, insightful as well as inspirational.

I have stayed true to my dream to teach yoga and share my passion for it with everybody. With that aim in mind, I trained with Ana Forrest, creatrix of Forrest Yoga and I successfully completed the Forrest Yoga Foundation Teacher Training in Berlin in September 2017. It was an amazing experience filled with tears, of joy and laugher and heartache and rage and anger and magic, lots of magic. I met some incredible souls there who I’m lucky to call friends and who have my back. This year I’m completing my mentorship program with Sita Menon who is a Forrest Yoga guardian based in Berlin and I’ve learned so much from her and her assistant Ricarda and the other 7 teachers (warriors) doing the mentorship with me.

There have been many twists and turns on the road to today, the day my website is finally launched. I have had to overcome so many challenges, not only feeling not good enough for the task in hand but thinking I had nothing of interest to share and not believing in myself. In September 2016 I made a hard decision to restart my life again in Madrid, as the life I was living at that point was not true to me. I literally left my old life behind as I felt boxed in and didn’t feel I would ever get to fulfil my dreams. There were times I felt completely hopeless and it was this that drove me to take the drastic step of moving on. I felt scared and anxious to be beginning again as it was different doing it now, from when I was excited by the newness of Madrid ten years earlier. There were times I felt absolutely devastated and totally lost and I didn’t know where to go and was at a major cross road in my life.

I have spent the past two years overcoming all sorts of fears, such as fear of failure and fear of not being good enough, and lack of faith in myself by beginning again to listen to my gut instinct and once heard to follow it. This was a new way for me to live after years spent ignoring it. I also began again to meditate regularly, initially for only 2 or 3 minutes, but now I sit for 30 minutes a session. All the while believing I was doing the right thing and everything would work out. For the best.

I’ve experienced days when I didn’t feel like getting up and days when I felt very angry at my life and when I criticised myself very harshly. But also I met people who stood by me and helped me to believe in myself and find the strength and motivation to keep on moving forward. I decided to do courses in mediation, mindfulness and Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) as well as practising different types of yoga. When I took that hard decision there were and still are repercussions that I’m dealing with but what I’ve gained is so much more valuable - the freedom to decide for myself what I want in my life.

One of my favourite poems is Begin by Brendan Kennelly – I have shared below the last four lines of the poem:

“Though we live in a world that dreams of ending
that always seems about to give in
something that will not acknowledge conclusion
insists that we forever begin. ”

from the Essential Brendan Kennelly

If you would like to read the full poem "Begin" just click below


Port do Son, Galicia

Port do Son, Galicia

74 views1 comment

Recent Posts

See All

Be who you are. Always!

Copyright © Mads Phoenix 2018 | All rights reserved.